There are those times when our dreams appear to fade before our very eyes. As it happens, it may challenge our faith and call into question the very essence of everything that we thought we knew or believed about God, happiness, peace, joy…. Love. At that moment we may be drawn into a sense that “it’s not worth it”, whatever that “it” may be. And as we do our best to somehow intellectually qualify and quantify what is before us, we may find that our hearts and minds do not align. It’s in those moments, man or woman, that our hearts may ache, that our eyes may mist and our heart cry tears that may dampen our will to live.

In those moments, who do we call to? And if anyone should answer, what are they to say? How are we to express the utter pain and despair that may enveloped us? In attempting to bridge the desire for what could have been and the moment of realization of that which appears before us that may call into question of what is truly right and wrong. And what of God? A God so loving that before we come to Him with our tears and anguish, He already knows. That before we have called out His name, His arms of love, mercy and compassion have already been opened wide to embrace us…

And yet, we may not, in our pain, turn to Him. In those moments, perhaps we may even question whether or not He truly even exists and if He does, how then, could such pain find us….

For me, a page turned when my infant son died of SIDS. And today, at this moment, after having cried, screamed, fallen and fainted, I seek to truly know. Not as our parents may have taught us. Not as the evangelists and preachers speak. Not as the theologians and historian would explain. But in a deeper, truly tangible expression of life. To see love made real, made whole in each and every day that I am blessed to be hear….

There are some challenges that you feel you'll never to recover from.